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The Kids Are All Id

by Randy Kaplan

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1.
"My Little Laugh" by Randy Kaplan We are all reactors. We react to stimuli But I always start to laugh where others they might cry. "Tee-he-ha-ha-ha" just sounds better than "Boo-hoo-hoo." If you think I’m talking rot I got examples. Here’s a few: I went to the doctor 'cause I had to get a shot Who knows where I got it or what it was I got? He held that needle high and said, "You’re gonna feel a pinch." That needle was like two-feet long if it was an inch And I said, "He-he-ha-ha-ha. He-he-he-he-ho-ho-ho." I giggled and I chuckled in that way. I laughed my little laugh and I felt better by half And I still think going to the doctor is okay. I got more examples for you to sample. Times I doubled up in laughter when they all expected me to weep. Let’s see. Oh, here’s one… I was riding bikes with my good friend Mike I wobbled down the hill a little faster than I’d have liked I hit a big pothole and it made me lose control I flew over the handlebars and to the curb I rolled. And I said, "He-he-ha-ha-ha. He-he-he-he-ho-ho-ho." I snickered from my head down to my feet. I laughed my little laugh and I felt better by half. And I chuckle still when I fall to the street. Yeah, battle scars are kinda neat. Now, this little quirk of my personality, one of the many personality quirks I’m in possession of, works in the opposite direction too. You see when I was turning seven… I had a birthday party and all my friends were there. We played a lot of party games and I won them fair and square. We’d hired a singer too. We could barely afford his fee. And when he sang a rousing Happy Birthday just for me I said, "Boo hoo hoo hoo hoo. Waa aa aa aa aa." And I sniveled and sobbed until my cheeks were soaked. I cried and ran away. And I heard my mother say, "He’s all mixed up. He’s gone and climbed the oak tree." Yeah, they were worried about me. The firemen arrived and said, "We’ll get him down alive." They climbed up on their ladder but that disturbed a big old hive The honey bees flew out and they started to swarm about. I got a dozen stings but did I cry or scream or shout? No, I said, "He-he-ha-ha-ha. He-he-he-he-ho-ho-ho." And I busted a gut and cackled in great glee. I laughed my little laugh and I felt better by half. And bugs that bite and sting still tickle me. Like mosquitoes, even fleas. C’mon, he-he-ha-ha-ha. Ho-ho-ho-ho-who-who-who. Chortle, cackle, giggle along with me. Laugh your little laugh. You’ll feel better by half. Oh, ha-ha-ha-ha-he-he-he-he-he. Ha-ha-ha-ha-he-he-he-he-he.
2.
"The Hebrew-Speaking Bear (Heave Ho!)" by Randy Kaplan Shalom, everybody. Ma Nishmah? Hey, wait. Where ya’ goin’? Sleechah! Hmm. Let’s see what kind of ruckus I can raise in town today. What are these? Hmm. Well, todah raba to whoever left them here. And betayavon. Ani m'dabear Eavrit. Ata m'dabear Eavrit. We all m'dabear with pizzazz and flair. Even that bear on the street. Vhat? Zhere’s a bear on zhe street V hoo m'dabear Eavrit? Cain, he’s in pain and his tears fall like rain 'Cause he ate my soccer cleats. Heave ho! He didn’t like the spikes or the leather or the laces or the soles or the goals they scored. So he washed them down with a pint of dirt And he strolled into town with a stomach that hurt. And he plopped himself down to have dessert And to wreck my checkerboard. Then a ping-pong paddle he sniffed. And a hobbity horse he licked. Then he scrounged around the lost and found And swallowed a pogo stick. Heave Ho! Oh, it's rare to be light on your feet When you dare to eat some laces Or bite a shoe that paces or kicks a ball. This tale sounds tall But he learned to speak Hebrew one summer last fall. That's quite a feat! And he didn’t even cheat. There's a spring in his step and he’s got some pep For a Hebrew-speaking bear who ate some soccer cleats. But the spring in his step is from the pogo stick That he swallowed whole. Yeah, it took its toll. Now he hops like a bunny. And at first we thought it funny But you can’t even hide in a tree anymore 'Cause he springs in the air. The advantage is unfair. And he's burping up a storm and he's rotten to the core. Or maybe just rusting at the core. Ani m'dabear Eavrit. Ata m'dabear Eavrit. We all m'dabear with pizzazz and flair. Even that bear on the street. Heave ho! Ma Ha'anyanim, kids?! Do your shoes have rubber soles and tongues and holes? I like the stripes and heels. They're ripe. Ripe for the picking. And even the licking. Yeah, sour and sweet are your shoes. But the feet. Hey, I wonder how a foot would taste. If the shoes are that good then I, for one, would definitely like to try the feet! Sounds fun. Let's make haste. To the campground. It's a race. A race to the foot! It’s a foot race. L'hitraot! And Itriyot too! Mmmm, I’m making myself hungry.
3.
Little Bee 03:31
"Little Bee" by Randy Kaplan Little bee, I want to play with you But I'm afraid. Little bee, I am suspicious of you. I think you like me for my… My what? …lemonade. What? You’re saying I have an ulterior motive for hanging around? Well, I admit I do like lemonade. Little bee, the color of the sun. You're keeping me warm. Little bee, you showed me where you're from. You introduced me to your… My what? …your swarm. I did? Yeah, you did. You met all my drones? Yes. Hey, can you tell everyone how pretty you are since they can't see you? Okay. I've got a black belt and a yellow belly. My knotted back felt like my spine was jelly. But then the facts melt and you end up kvelling. Busy little bee buzzing humbly. Buzz around with me. Little bee, I want to be with you. Be not afear'd. Little bee, I long to listen to you When you're humming in my… In your what? …my ear. A shady tree, a honeycomb. Always never coming home. Karma of a Gemini. Sting me and you'll surely die. Die? Whatever are you talking about? I'm the queen bee. I don't die. I'm not some worker bee or honey bee! I can sting multiple times. I'm the queen! I got no barbs on my stinger at all! I'll tell you what I've do got though: I've got a black belt and a yellow belly. My knotted back felt like my spine was jelly. But then the facts melt and you end up kvelling. Busy little bee buzzing humbly. Buzz around with me. C'mon. Let the whole hive join in! We've got black belts and yellow bellies. Our knotted backs felt like our spines were jelly. But then the facts melt and you end up kvelling. Busy little bee buzzing humbly. Buzz around with me! As far as ulterior motives go perhaps you like me for my honey. No. I like you for you. Oh, you want to be my king bee? That sounds nice. But there's no such thing as a king bee. You could be the first.
4.
"The Kid Is All Id" by Randy Kaplan That's rigatoni, maybe penne, but it's not a thumb puppet. There's enough sauce in your hair. Why can't you get some in your stomach? The table’s not a canvas and your food is not paint. Did you just say you’re finished? I got news for you. You ain’t. Stop asking me to change you into an Elmo diaper. Take that one off again somebody’s gonna pay the piper. And it’ll probably be me. Yeah, my sanity’s on the line. Terrible twos and threes and fours. Can’t wait until you’re nine. I think I’m gonna flip my gosh-darned lid. The kid is all id. The kid is all id. Yeah! We swung on the swing for an hour today. And we jumped in the pool and we sang and we played. And I was subjected to that purple dinosaur For like the 200th time. I say he's rotten to the core. Oh you're a cranky devil when you're not in front of the tube. And you've been a little tyrant since you've been off of the (boooooop). My nerves are all shot. I'm at the end of my rope. I don't think I can do it. I don't think that I can cope. I try to let it slide but my sanity slid. The kid is all id. The kid is all id. Yeah! Hey, that's grape juice you’ve got and that’s not a sippy cup! Take it back to the table. Enough is enough. Where the heck did he go? Oh my-- he's on the couch! Where'd he put the grape juice? What's that thing in his mouth? He eats my guitar picks and shoves food in the sound hole. Did he go to a cookout? His poop looks like charcoal. Look at it. It’s strange. What is it? I can’t tell. It’s like blueberry soft serve yogurt or Carvel. Uggh. Yikes. Zhe word “id” is from zhe German and actually means “it”. It is zhe part of zhe child zhat seeks immediate gratification, zhat wants vhat it vants when it vants it with no consideration of zhe consequences whatsoever. Of course, ve all have zhe id but it is most prevalent in zhe children, where zhe overbearing superego vith all its rules and regulations has not yet developed sufficiently enough to induce guilt. A child vith its ID running rampant is likely to scream in enclosed places, to interrupt its elders, to— AHHHHHHH!!! Simmer down back there! If I hear another sound, Not to mention that screech, I'm gonna turn this car around. It's not just annoying. I fear for my hearing. Where did he get that voice? I’m gonna lose control of the steering! I give him purple nurples and pink bellies too. We work our schedule 'round his naptimes. What else can we do? Please stop running rampant. Can’t you see it’s just wrong? I’m sick of having to sing you that Rolling Stones song. “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” Want Want Want Want! I know you’re just turning three but why can’t you relax? I’m gonna blow my stack. I’m stressed out to the max. Where does it come from, all his verve and vigor and vim And zest and feistiness? I wish I had as much as him. He threw my glasses in the pool? Never do that again! I laid down to go to sleep one time but I can’t remember when. That cat toy's like a fishing rod. Don't stab him with the pole! You got the attention span of a two-year-old. You wouldn’t believe half the things he did. The kid is all id. The kid is all id. Yeah! Oh please, let him fall asleep soon. I’m tired of those Three Little Pigs and even Goodnight Moon. He’s got enough energy to short out any grid! Zhe kid is all Id.
5.
"The Money Song" by Harold Rome
6.
"I Got Plenty O' Nuttin'" by George Gershwin, Ira Gershwin, and Dubose Heyward / additional lyrics by Randy Kaplan
7.
"The Derby Ram" — Traditional / additional lyrics by Randy Kaplan As I was going to Derby all on a market day, I met the biggest ram, my boys, that ever was fed on hay. He had four feet to walk upon, four feet on which to stand. And every time he took a step he covered an acre of land. And indeed, my lads, it's true. My lads, I never was known to lie. And if you'd been in Derby, you'd have seen him the same as I. One horn on this ram’s head, me lads, it grew so very long That every time he shook himself it rattled against the sun. The other horn on this ram's head, it reached up to the moon. A little girl went up in January and she didn't get back till June. And indeed… This ram he had the sharpest tail. It dug a hole in the ground. When he began to waggle it it spun the whole world round. This loosened up his baby teeth which were like ivory towers. When they fell out they hit the ground and the earth quaked for an hour. And indeed… The wool on this ram's back, my boys, it grew so very high. The eagles came and built their nests and I heard the young 'uns cry. Now all of this ram's wool, me lads, it made him snort and sneeze. When he let loose he toppled down a hundred loquat trees. And indeed… The man that fed this ram, my boys, he fed him thrice a day (three times). And every time he opened his mouth he swallowed a rick of hay. Now all the kids in Derby wanted a ride on this ram's back. But the man who fed this ram said, "No, he’ll think you’re just a snack." And indeed… The man who walked this ram, my boys, he carried a giant scoop. A shovel the size of a snow plow to clean up this ram's p-- So now my song is ended. I've nothing more to say, Just give us another box of juice and we'll all of us go away.
8.
This Guy 00:48
"This Guy" based on a traditional joke / additional dialogue by Randy Kaplan —What has two thumbs and likes ice cream? —This guy. —What has two thumbs and listens to Burl Ives? —This guy. —What has two thumbs and eats two breakfasts? —This guy. —What has two thumbs and watched Das Rheingold in its entirety yesterday? —This guy. —What has two thumbs and is going to New Zealand this winter? —This guy. —What has two thumbs and can discuss the powers of the tarnhelm and Alberich’s abuse of them in great length? —This guy. —What has four thumbs and likes chocolate cake? —This guy. —You don't have four thumbs! What are you, counting your big toes as thumbs? —This guy. —Is that all you can say? —This guy. —Get outta here! —I won't.
9.
"Don't You Leave Me Here" — Traditional / additional lyrics by Randy Kaplan One time my mom came to me and said, "Randy, we're going to the diner for a bite to eat tonight." And I said, "Yes! I’m gonna have waffles and pancakes and grilled cheese well done and orange juice and soda and--." And my mom said, "Hold on a minute, Randy. By 'we' I meant me and your father. You are staying here with the babysitter." And I said, Don't you leave me here. Don't you leave me here. If you just must go-o--o, Bring me a large root beer. Don't you leave me here. My mom said, "You'll be sleeping by the time we get home. And even if you were awake, you can't drink soda that late at night!" And even though I argued, the babysitter came over. She said, "Hiii. How ya' doin'?" and my folks left. The babysitter saw that I was upset so she tried to distract me. She said, "Randy. Do you know how a rooster crows?" And I said, "Rooster? That sounds like root beer." And she said, "Can you make a chicken sound?" I said, "Chicken? That reminds me. I wanted to order scrambled eggs!" And I tried to chase my parents down singing, Don't you leave me here. But I didn't get far. I couldn't even get the front door open because the babysitter was barring the way. Then she came up with a game to take my mind off the diner. She said, "Let's play diner." I said, "What’s that?" She said, "I’ll, like, pretend I'm the waitress and you're a guy in the booth. And I'll take your order." I said, "Hmmph." She said, "Okay, sir, what would you like?" I said, "I’ll have pancakes." And she went over to the kitchen and started fussing about in there. She yelled out, "Uchh. It’s so disorganized. Where’s the flour?" I told her and she turned the stove on and mixed stuff and before I knew it she put down in front of me a giant pancake. I said, "Hmmph." She said, "What’s the matter? That’s like the sickest pancake ever!" I said, "I ordered pancakes. With an s. You see... I never have one pancake at a time. I always have six, seven, eight, or nine." And the babysitter said, "Uch. I'm nauseous. Are you talking about silver dollar pancakes? The kind you get at the International House of Stomachaches? Well, I hate to tell you Randy, but your parents didn’t go to the IHOP. No, They’re Daisy’s Diner bound or Dizzy’s Diner bound." I said, "I wish they’d stop and turn around And not be diner bound." But they were diner bound. So I ate the giant pancake and then we played some other games to pass the time. Parcheesi, Chutes and Ladders, Witch Witch, Don’t Tip the Waiter, Mousetrap, and my favorite, Candyland. I always rigged the cards in advance so that I got the candycanes and gumdrops and my opponent got single color squares. And then I brushed my teeth and got into bed. My babysitter sat on the edge of my bed and said, "Okay, Randy. I'm like, gonna tell you a story." I said, "Okay. That sounds good." And she said, "Do you remember I told you about that girl who smashed her father's DeLorean into the fire hydrant on Orlando Avenue? Well they got the car fixed and let her borrow it again. And she smashed it up again. Into the same fire hydrant. Is that like the sickest thing you ever heard?" And I said, "This story isn’t really appropriate for kids." And she said, "Uch. I'm nauseous. I'm going downstairs to call Marjorie, Stacey, and Nicki. I have to tell them!" And she left my room and as I saw her permanent waved and highlighted hair bounce out of view I said, "Don’t you leave me here. Don’t you leave me here. But if you just must go-o-o, Bring me a large root beer. Don’t you leave me here."
10.
"Is She a Girl or Is She a Monkey" by Randy Kaplan Is she a girl or is she a monkey? Is she a girl or is she a monkey? She’s got a girl’s clothes but she climbs like a monkey. Is she a girl or is she a monkey? Is she a girl or is she a monkey? Is she a girl or is she a monkey? She’s got a girl’s hair but she hangs like a monkey. Is she a girl or is she a monkey? She’s got scrapes on her knees from scaling trees And brushing against those branches. Like a leaf in the wind she shakes and dances. Look at her go! Look out below! She’s taking risky chances on brittle little bending branches! Is she a girl or is she a monkey? Is she a girl or is she a monkey? She’s got a girl's smile but she swings like a monkey. Is she a girl or is she a monkey?
11.
"Whistle for Willie" — based on the Ezra Jack Keats book Whistle For Willie / Music and additional lyrics by Randy Kaplan Willie is my best friend and my Dachshund dog. Willie likes to sit there like a bump on a log. If I could whistle Willie'd come running. Well, he’s a Dachshund so he'd jog. I pucker up and try until my face turns blue. I sound nothing like the kite or bobwhite at the zoo. I guess I gotta practice more. Yes, that’s what I’ve got to do. (Whistling) Well since I can’t whistle yet I’ll spin around. My dizzy eyes’ll turn the whole world upside down. If you want me you can find me. I’ll be in the lost and found. Yeah, I’ll pretend this carton I found is a lost and found. I’m quick as a wink and loose as a goose. Before you can blink I can tie my shoes. Still I’m sitting in this carton with the w-w-w-whistling blues. (Whistling) I’m stooped over lowdown as I walk. I’m drawing on the ground with a piece of chalk. I wouldn’t have to whistle if Willie’d listen when I talked. Like when I say, “C’mere, Willie!” He doesn’t listen. I’m following the sidewalk, stepping on the cracks. Now I’m staring in the mirror wearing my father’s hat. You should hear my father whistle. No one can whistle like that. He goes: whoo, whoo, but he really whistles good. Can anybody here whistle? Let me hear you. Try again. It takes a lot of practice. Oh, the warp and the woof of whistlin’. The girls jumping rope, sidewalk sizzlin’. Whoo whoo whoo. My effort’s fizzlin’. I just can’t do it, sad but true. I even did what Lauren Bacall said to do. I wet my whistle and I put my lips together and blew. (Whistling) I’m running from my shadow and I’m hiding now In the same old carton. Willie, slow as a cow, Is coming round the corner and I go like this, Whoo. Wow! (Whistling) Now I whistle as I do my errands and my chores. I whistle at the bakery and the grocery store. And best of all my whistle’s something Willie never ignores! (Whistling Chorus)
12.
Dream Hat 04:18
"Dream Hat" — inspired by the Ezra Jack Keats book Jennie’s Hat / music and lyrics by Randy Kaplan I tried on a straw basket, I tried on a lampshade too. (I wanted to make myself a great hat.) I tried on a flower pot. I stuck it to my wig with some glue. But those flowers made me sneeze, Hat-Hat-Hat-Hat-Hat-Hat-choo! I tried on everything, anything that was roundabout head-sized. I tried on a cushion case but the zipper zipped the lids of my eyes. I tried on a fly strip but no one wants a hat made out of flies. I tried so many things to make myself a hat that was the best. I became so dedicated my mother said, “Randy, I think you’re, like, obsessed!” I turned the kitchen into a millinery and my mom said, “Randy! Clean up this millinery mess!” I had a dream last night. In it I was bald. I was scattering some bird seed, trying to do a good bird call. Oh yeah. Then all those pretty birds pitched in To build me a hat like a nest. Round without and within. It was anything but hatter-of-fact, this dream. I was far from conscious shores. I saw hat-erpillars copping hattitudes, pretending to be hatadors. I started searching for hatural materials. Like straw and iron ore. That would be one heavy hat for sure. One bluebird said, “The hat should have orange and brown leaf-like lines.” But a hummingbird piped up, “Stripes are too weird, It’ll look like the planet Haturn.” Bluebird said, “Fine.” I said, “Whatever we do let’s get us a hatent so nobody can steal our design!” Suddenly, a hattlesnake with a hattoo of a shiny hat hissed on by. We loved his shiny hat hattoo. So we got some hatin and finished the hat on the sly. It was done, it was great, it was perfect, I was hatisfied. But the hattlesnake was mad because he saw that we’d stolen his idea. He said, “I’m gonna hat you out,” and into our hearts this struck great fear. He said, “I’ll swallow that hat whole like I swallow rats that come too near.” But we begged him and we pleaded. We said, “Please don’t be a hattle tale!” He said, “I’m gonna sue you all. You’ll all end up in jail!” Then he slithered back to his hateau. It was as big as the Hatican. And he left a slimy snake trail. Then I woke up and tried on a straw basket. I tried on a lampshade too. I tried on a flower pot. I stuck it to my wig with some glue. But those flowers made me sneeze, Hat-Hat-Hat-Hat-Hat-Hat-choo!
13.
I Like Cacti 03:37
"I Like Cacti" — inspired by the Ezra Jack Keats book Clementina’s Cactus / music and lyrics by Randy Kaplan I wanna write a desert sonnet. I wanna dance a desert dance. I got a bee in my bonnet. I got ants in my pants I wanna throw a desert boulder. I wanna eat a desert pie. There’s a bluebird on my shoulder. There’s a twinkle in my eye, yeah my eye. Yeah I, I like cacti. In fact, I think I love them. Big sky smiling above them, grinning ear to ear. I really love it here. Yeah, there’s a bee in my bonnet. And she sits there in the shade Of my brim and she’s in there ‘cause I’m drinking lemonade. And I’m walking through the desert with my very skinny friend. And I’m back, it’s a fact, to the place I recommend. I recommend the desert because I, I like cacti. As a matter of fact, I really love them. Big sky smiling above them, grinning ear to ear to ear. I really love it here. Cactus flower blooming bright, Blooming in the desert night. Your sharp spines like hornets’ stings. Don’t worry. I won’t count your rings. What attracts us about a cactus? I think it keeps us thinking warm. All that sand gets soaked in a desert thunderstorm. Yeah, I like the salamander and the burros and the weevils too. But, Prickly Pear, there ain’t nothing that compares to you. You’re the best. I guess it’s just that I, I like cacti. In fact, I think I love them. Big sky smiling above them, grinning ear to ear to ear. I really love it here.
14.
"Papa Ling's Tune" by Michelle Fiordaliso Papa Ling took Jo-Jo’s boo-boo out. He did it so nicely Jo-Jo didn’t even shout.
15.
Joe and Finn 03:36
"Joe and Finn" by Randy Kaplan This is a song about Joe and Finn. Joe and Finny were the best of friends. They used to run around hopping and playing in the backyard nude. Splashing and dancing and laughing in the kiddie pool. The breeze would blow, the summer sun would shine. And Holly would play, “Mama, You’ve Been on My Mind.” And I would sing. And Michelle would sit on the blanket with Papa Ling. But this ain’t a song about us, no. This is a song about Finn and Joe. They were the best of friends in case you didn’t know. One time Joe got a splinter and he started to cry. So his momma gave him kisses on his nose and on his ears and on his eyes. And once Joe ate some of Finny’s snack. So Finny tried to bite him just to get him back. And Virginia would growl and fight with Cody and Red. And the shock collar didn’t work half as well as Holly said. But this ain’t a song about that, no. This is a song about Joe and Finn. Joe and Finny were the best of friends. They would chase each other around with the garden hose. Butterflies would flutter by. Mosquitoes tried to bite their noses. But this ain’t a song about bugs. Uh-uh. This is a song about Finn and Joe. Finn and Joe, in case you didn’t know, Were the very best friends that three-year-olds could be. They’ll maybe even stay a sliver in each others’ memories. Way back then on the island long The kids would play and I’d sing some songs. I’d sing “Just to Bring My Holly Home.” And Michelle’s cell would ring. I’d want to smash that phone. But this ain’t a song about us, no. This is a song about Joe and Finn. Joe and Finny were the best of friends. They used to run around laughing and playing in the backyard nude. Splashing and dancing and swimming in the kiddie pool. Splashing and dancing and swimming in the kiddie pool. Nude.
16.
Dreamin' 02:11
"Dreamin'" by Joseph Rumi Fiordaliso-Riahi I was dreaming so galore. I was dreaming by the door. I had bad ones and some good too. I wasn’t happy without you. I was lonely for you. I was lonely for you.
17.
"Forever Young" by Bob Dylan

about

"Young ids love his music... which combines American roots, country blues and storytelling." —The New York Times

Randy's third not-JUST-for-kids CD, THE KIDS ARE ALL ID (2010), won top honors from NAPPA, their Gold Award, was voted a Top Five CD in the NICKELODEON Parents' Picks Awards, and appeared on the Top Ten CDs of 2010 lists of FIDS & KAMILIES, TIME OUT NEW YORK KIDS, ZOOGLOBBLE, OWTK, and FAMILY MAN ONLINE (where it was awarded the #1 slot)! "For all of its ability to capture children's perspectives and parents' experiences this (album) is one of the best I have ever heard. You need to hear it too," raved Family Man Online. The record features all-time classics like Bob Dylan's "Forever Young," "I Got Plenty O' Nuttin'" (from Porgy & Bess), and "The Derby Ram" (George Washington's favorite folk song) along with original songs like "The Hebrew-Speaking Bear," "The Kid Is All Id," and "Little Bee." There are also three songs based on the classic picture books of Ezra Jack Keats.

"One can but hope to make a child laugh or feel clear and happy-headed as he follows the simple rhythm to its logical end. It can jog him with the unexpected and comfort him with the familiar, lift him for a few minutes from his own problems of shoelaces that won't tie, and busy parents and mysterious clock time, into the world of a bug or a bear or a bee or a boy living in the timeless world of a story."
-Margaret Wise Brown (Brownie)

__________

REVIEWS of The Kids Are All Id:

"Randy Kaplan's latest in what is now becoming his genre (the children's song that is subversively also meant for adults) is even more respectful of kids' wits than usual. Never one to talk down to tot, Kaplan, on "The Kids Are All Id," takes the title seriously and delivers an amiable but jaundiced set, infusing these seventeen songs with wit, sarcasm, whimsy and a kind of carefree bite that will certainly resonate with little ones and their parents... Randy Kaplan is slowly becoming a national treasure."
—Mike Wood / MUSIC EMISSIONS

"I like getting press releases with the CDs I receive for review, but sometimes they'll hype the CD too much. In the case of family musician Randy Kaplan’s The Kids Are All Id, however, the press release is right on the mark. No, wait, I take that back. It should have gone on and on even more about what an awesomely fun-for-all-ages CD this really is... There are no weak spots on this CD or on any of Kaplan's past CDs nor will there be, I predict, on any of his future CDs. This guy is what makes children and family music listenable and cool."
—Charlotte Bohn / BALTIMORE'S CHILD

"With ample imagery, storytelling, humor, grace and genuine emotion, “The Kids Are All Id” is about as close as a piece of polycarbonate plastic can come to being musical theater. It’s hard to imagine “The Kids Are All Id” being more superb. With his 3rd “not-just for kids” album, Kaplan has nailed it."
—Jeff Bogle / OWTK

"The Kids Are All Id is Randy Kaplan's best album yet, and shows Kaplan's greatest strength -- his ability to listen to and interact with the kids who are his audience and to turn that into stories in song."
—SA Shepherd / Zooglobble

"(This is) the smartest -- and possibly most hilarious -- children's music of the year... Kaplan's weird, hilarious and sophisticated songs are the best we've heard this summer. Like the other good children's albums from this summer, he appeals to kids and adults -- but there is something more to his songs that take them to another level of brilliance. If you have children, "The Kids Are All Id" is like a massage to the head, along with some belly laughs -- all the while being something your kiddos will think is fun and enjoyable. Heck, you might even find yourself turning it on when they aren't there."
—Andrew Druckenbrod / Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

"Randy Kaplan has a new children’s CD! This is big news at our house... He’s obviously having a great time writing these hugely entertaining, goofy, offbeat, and truly wonderful songs. He’s an incomparable storyteller, and each song is its own little world... My only complaint about this new CD is that it is kind of driving me nuts. The grownups in this house want to hear the whole album over and over again, whereas (my son) wants to hear each song over and over again, so that it takes approximately 3 hours to finally hear them all!"
—Laura Lucanidae / Stag Beetle Power!

"The Kids Are All Id is a family-friendly CD by Randy Kaplan, designed to appeal to listeners of all ages. Some of the tracks are timeless classics; others are original storytelling-songs; all blend delightful adventures with playful rhythms and flippant humor. Kids and adults alike are sure to enjoy the clever compositions. The Kids Are All Id is especially fun to listen to on car trips or other excursions with young ones."
—Midwest Book Review

"I often get carried away in calling albums one of the best of the year, but for all of its ability to capture children’s perspectives and parents’ experiences this one is one of the best I have ever heard. You need to hear it too."
—Gregory Keer / Family Man Online

"Super singer/storyteller Randy Kaplan is the thinking kids' musician. He is no ordinary kids' music performer. Oh, sure, he may sing about monkeys, bears and queen bees, but on his latest CD he also has my kids asking me to explain Freud, the definition of Hebrew terms, and even why someone might be happier with no money. In other words, if you've got a precocious, question-everything kid, meet the perfect CD to get them thinking while they sing along."
—Christina / Cool Mom Picks

"Kids who laugh at bee stings, a Hebrew-speaking bear who eats shoelaces, a monkey-like girl and George Washington’s favorite giant sheep inspire the songs on Randy Kaplan’s third not-just-for-kids music release, The Kids Are All Id. The Parent Picks poll on Nickelodeon’s Parentsconnect just named it as one of five Best Kids’ Music CDs of 2010. From the first song, “My Little Laugh,” in which a kid’s emotional responses are all topsy turvy, it’s apparent that Randy Kaplan’s slant on life is a little different. Offering a Woody Guthrie-esque style that blends a chatty kind of storytelling with an eclectic range of rootsy music, Kaplan paints a humorous and poignant picture with every track.
—Andrea / Mommy PR

"Part rockin' jams, part comedy act, Randy Kaplan is hilarious! The title track of this CD will make you LOL with lyrics like "You've been a little tyrant since you've been off of the boob." It's a song every parent of a toddler (and beyond!) can relate to! (Oh, and the kids dig him, too!)"
—Nickelodeon Parents' Pick CD Review

credits

released May 14, 2010

THE KIDS ARE ALL ID was Produced, Recorded, Mixed, and Mastered by Mike West at his 9th Ward Pickin’ Parlor in Lawrence, Kansas in December of aught-nine except:

Dreamin’ recorded by Randy at The Fiordafreako Atelier in Santa Monica, CA and Kqxhc’s dialogue recorded by Randy at The Floating Desk in Los Angeles, CA

Executive Producer: Susan Fox
Anarchivist and Assistant to Mr. Kqxhc: Scott Bernstein

Personnel:
Randy Kaplan: Guitar, Vocals, Harmonica
Mike West: Mandolin, Banjo, Guitar, Vocal Harmonies
Katie Euliss: Upright Bass, Percussion, Vocal Harmonies
Colin Mahoney: Drums, Percussion
Bradford Hoopes: Piano, Melodica, Chimes
Tom Johnson: Trombone
Nate Craft: Tuba, Trombone
John Thompson: Accordion
Erica Jolene Brandt: Saw
Vega West: Les Dialogues, Screeching
Julian West: This Guy, Guffawing, Monkeying
Sadie West: Whistling
Arthur Mahoney: Whistling, Monkeying, Screeching
Elliot Mahoney: Whistling, Monkeying, Screeching
Joseph Rumi Fiordaliso Riahi: Vocals on Dreamin’
Michelle Fiordaliso: Vocals on Papa Ling’s Tune
Kqxhc Kaplan: Dialogue in Is She a Girl or Is She a Monkey

CD Design / Collages / Coloring: Laurent Rivelaygue
Id Photo Shoot: Alexandra DeFurio
Co-Director: Michelle Fiordaliso
Photographic Subjects: Joseph Rumi Fiordaliso Riahi, Lara Foley, Julia Foley, Jana Heckerman, Emma Heckerman, and Annika Thiele
Photographs of Randy and his Mom Walking Through Cactus Garden: Marvin Milich. Cacti Photo: Randy
Detail of Kinderschule by Rolf Nesch - Ol auf Leinwant - 1930
Drawings and Prints: Randy

All songs ©2010 by Randy Kaplan and published by Treeleigh Music (ASCAP) except:

The Money Song – by Harold Rome; published by Chappell & Co.
I Got Plenty O’ Nuttin’ – by George Gershwin, Ira Gershwin, and Dubose Heyward; additional lyrics by RK; published by Chappell & Co.
The Derby Ram and Don’t You Leave Me Here – Traditional; additional lyrics by RK; published by Treeleigh Music (ASCAP)
Whistle For Willie - based on Ezra Jack Keats’s book Whistle For Willie; published by Treeleigh Music (ASCAP)
Dream Hat - inspired by Ezra Jack Keats’s book Jennie’s Hat; published by Treeleigh Music (ASCAP)
I Like Cacti – inspired by Ezra Jack Keats’s book Clementina’s Cactus; published by Treeleigh Music (ASCAP)
Papa Ling’s Tune - by Michelle Fiordaliso; published by Treeleigh Music (ASCAP)
Dreamin’ - song by Joseph Rumi Fiordaliso Riahi – dialogue by Randy Kaplan, Joseph Rumi Fiordaliso Riahi, and Mike West; published by Treeleigh Music (ASCAP)
Forever Young – by Bob Dylan; published by Sony/ATV Tunes LLC Obo Samp-UK Ltd.

Thanks to Susan Fox and Jim van Putten at ParkSlopeParents.com; Mindy Thomas, Robbie Schaefer, Kenny Curtis, et al. at Sirius-XM Radio Kids Place Live; Judi and Marvin Milich; Scott Bernstein; Julie May; Michelle and Joe; KC Mancebo and David Tobocman at ClamorhouseKids.com; Dr. Martin Pope, Dr. Lillie Pope, Dr. Deborah Pope, Arthur J. Jacobs, et al. at The Ezra Jack Keats Foundation; Todd Feuer, Marc Clark, et al. at Mindsmack.com; Stephanie Mayers and Stacey Rosen at Kindie Rock PR; Gabriel Leigh; Graham Nugent; Eleni Mandell; Suzi Shelton; Danielle Harrison; Truckstop Honeymoon; Katie, Mike, Sadie, Vega, Julian, and Esther; Lisa, Colin, Arthur, and Elliot; Linda, Bradford, Benjamin, and Annelise; Erica, Tom, Nate, and John; Stella, Owen, Lara, and Julia; Simone, Ed, Jana, and Emma; Andrea, Christoph, and Annika; Carrie, Wrye, Malcolm, and Lola; Sherri and Rebecca; Erin and Brian; Virginia Halfwolf, my pals at McCabe’s Guitar Shop in Santa Monica and at Symphony Space in Manhattan; Laurie Cearley; Anne and James at Play in LA; Liz Joyce at Goat on a Boat Puppet Theatre in Sag Harbor; Jennifer Gilson at The Living Room in New York; John Greco and Kota Onouchi at Josephine Press; Gabriele Braun at Hauswedell & Nolte Auctions Hamburg; my Wagonwheel and Beansprouts gangs; Stefan Shepherd; Bill Childs; Jeff Bogle; F.O.R.K.s everywhere; my family and my friends.

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Randy Kaplan Detroit, Michigan

ADULTS: Nashville Blues & Roots Alliance calls Randy “a master of old-time, Delta-influenced guitar,” and the Smoky Mountain Blues Society says he’s “an absolute ace guitarist, picker, and ragtime player.”

KIDS: Randy's blend of American Roots Music and Comedic Storytelling has inspired the likes of NPR and PEOPLE magazine to name Randy one of the nation’s top family entertainers.
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